Good Jokes

Joke: Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach activists showed up to push her back into the ocean!

Joke: What kind of key doesn't open a lock?

Joke: My brother responded very badly to going to jail. He always yells at everybody, steals, and refuses to drink or eat.

It's the last time we play Monopoly.

Joke: A frivolous biologist buys too many expensive chemicals and lab equipment. A frivolous engineer buys too much expensive hardware. A frivolous mathematician buys an extra pencil.

Joke: A woman walks up to the checkout line at a store with these items: 2% milk, bread, Pepsi, macaroni, and cookies. She sees a drunk man. The man says "You must be single."

The woman is startled. How could he have known? He didn't see her hands and the man couldn't have figured it out from her items. "How did you know?" she asked.

He replied, "Cause your ugly!"