Dirty Jokes

Joke: A husband and wife decide to relive their first date on their 10th anniversary. They come to the fence that they first made love up against. The man looks at his wife "For old time's sake?" She nods and they begin to make love.

He pushes her up against the fence and says "You're even tighter than you were when we started to date!"

She replies "The fence wasn't electric 10 years ago!"

Joke: A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a zoophile, a necrophiliac, and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution. "Let's have sex with a cat." Suggested the zoophile. "Let's have sex with a cat and then torture it," suggests the sadist. "Let's have sex with a cat, torture it and then kill it!" shouted the murderer. "Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophiliac. "Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it" said the pyromaniac. There was silence, then the masochist said: "Meow."

Joke: What is long and hard that every polish woman gets on her wedding night?

Joke: A couple has been happily married for ten years and have 4 kids. But for their entire relationship they have never had sex with the lights on because the husband refuses to ever have sex with the lights on. But one night, his wife decides to flick the lights on in the middle of sex. When she does she looks down and sees her husband using a dildo instead of his penis.

She becomes furious and yells at him, "Have you been doing this our entire relationship? You have some explaining to do!"

He looks at her, stunned, and says, "I'll explain this when you explain the kids."

Joke: What's the best part of a blowjob?