Dirty Jokes

Joke: A doctor specializing in circumcision retires after 30 years on the job. He kept all of the foreskins from all of the circumcisions he has ever performed. In remembrance of his career, he goes to a leathersmith and tells him to make something out of them.

A week later he presents the doctor with a wallet. The doctor asks him, "This is all you could make out of all of those foreskins?"

The leathersmith replies, "It's kinda cold in here. Stroke it a little and you'll have yourself a briefcase."

Joke: I was having sex with my girlfriend the other day and she kept yelling some other guy's name. Who the heck is Rape?

Joke: Interviewer: What would you say was your greatest weakness?
Interviewee: Honesty.
Interviewer: I wouldn't call honesty a weakness.
Interviewee: Honestly, I don't give a fuck what you think.

Joke: One evening a man went into a bar. He was surprised to see a little man, 15 inches tall, playing a piano. So he asked the bartender, "Where did you find him?" The bartender held up a bottle and said, "If you rub the bottle, a genie will come out and grant you a wish."

So he said "Oh wow! May I try it?" The bartender replied "Sure, go ahead." As soon as the man rubbed the bottle the genie came out and said, "Your wish is my command."

The man wished for a million bucks. Immediately a million ducks appeared. The man asked, "What's wrong with this genie? I asked for a million bucks, not ducks!"

The bartender replied, "Do you really think I wished for a 15 inch pianist?"

Joke: A man walks into an elevator with a woman and asks her, "Can I smell your vagina?"

The woman yells at him, "No!"

He replies, "Oh, must be your feet then."