Dirty Jokes

Joke: What does a vampire do with boiling water and a tampon?

Joke: A woman is golfing with a couple of her friends. On the first hole she sinks a twenty-foot putt. On her way to the second hole she gets stung by a bee. It is extremely painful so she runs off the course to find a doctor. She is extremely lucky and runs into one. He asks her, "Where did the bee sting you?"

She replies, "Between the first and second hole!"

He says, "Well first of all, your stance is way to wide."

Joke: What did the boy with no arms get for his birthday?

Joke: What happened when the wizard went into the gay bar?

Joke: A man and woman are sitting next to each other on a train. The woman sneezes, shudders violently, then wipes her nose. The man takes notice but doesn't say anything because he doesn't want to be rude.

Five minutes later she sneezes again, violently shudders, and wipes her nose. The man becomes curious and asks her, "I couldn't help but notice every time you sneeze you shudder violently."

She replies, "Yeah, I have a rare disease. Every time I sneeze I have an orgasm."

He blushes, "Oh, do you take anything for it?"

She shakes her head, "Yeah, pepper."