Chemistry Jokes

Joke: A bartender says "We don't allow your kind in here."

A faster-than-light neutrino walks into the bar.

Joke: Is Schrodinger's cat alive?

Joke: Why do white bears dissolve in water?

Joke: Organic chemists study carbon compounds.
Biochemists study carbon compounds that crawl.

Joke: Two chemists walk into a bar and the first one says, "I'll have some H₂O."

The second says, "I'll have some water too. Why'd you say 'H₂O'? We aren't at work."

The first chemist excuses himself and weeps in the bathroom.
His assassination plot had failed.