Good Jokes

Joke: A grandmother gives her grandson directions, "Once you get to the building open the door with your elbows. Once you get to the elevator his the up button with your elbow. I'm on the third floor so you're going to have to his the number 3 on the elevator with your elbow. Then once you get off I'm the first to the left, just hit the doorbell with your elbow."

The grandson replies, "That sounds easy enough, but why with my elbows?"

The grandmother says, "Oh... So you're going to be open handed?"

Joke: The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into production. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

Joke: Have you heard about the mathematician who was scared of negative numbers?

Joke: Only in America do banks leave both vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Joke: After Walker Texas Ranger it isn't credits that roll over the screen. It's a list of fatalities.