Funny Jokes

Joke: Mother's day is for moms and father's day for dads, but what do single guys get?

Joke: A woman says to her husband, "I'm sick of you pushing me around and talking behind my back!"

The husband replies, "But honey, your wheelchair!"

Joke: A termite walks into a bar and asks the waitress, is the bar tender here?

Joke: Why did the insomniac go to jail?

Joke: A kid is standing alone in the batter's box with a bat and a ball. He throws it up and swings at it, "Strike one!"

He throws it up again, "Strike two!"

He throws it up a third time, "Strike three! You're out!"

He grabs the ball and says, "Dang I'm a good pitcher!"