Dirty Jokes

 

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Joke: Emma didn't get very much sleep last night so she kept falling asleep at Sunday school. While she was sleeping, her teacher decided to ask her a question, "Who created the universe?"

The boy sitting next to her, Joey, poked her with his pencil to help her our. She jumped up and yelled, "God!"

The teacher told her, "Good job!" and continued with the lesson.

Soon after the teacher asked Emma another question, "Who died for our sins?"

Again she is sleeping so Joey pokes her. She wakes up and yells, "Jesus Christ!"

The teacher praises her again and continues.

Not much time passes and the teacher asks Emma, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 26th child?"

Joey pokes her and she yells, "If you put that thing near me again, I'll snap it in half and shove it up your ass!"


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Joke: What do you call a cow that is masturbating?


Punch line: Beef stroganoff!


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Joke: What do you call a closet full of lesbians?


Punch line: A liquor cabinet.


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Joke: A grandpa sees his grandson has a condom in his wallet and asks him "What's that?"

The grandson embarrassed, replies "They keep your cigarettes dry in the rain."

The following day the grandpa sees a man buying condoms and cigarettes at a gas station and tries to start a conversation "I bet your gonna put a long camel in those."


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Joke: A man comes home to his wife watching a cooking show and says, "Why are you watching this crap? You can't cook."

She replies, "Well you watch porn."


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