Clean Jokes

Joke: One blonde asks another while driving, "Is my blinker working?"

The other replies, "Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no."

Joke: A little girl is digging a hole in her yard. Her neighbor looks over the fence and asks her what she's doing. She tells him, "I'm burying my goldfish."

The neighbor replies, "That's a mighty big hole for a little goldfish."

The little girl smiles at him and says, "Not if he's inside your cat."

Joke: A grasshopper walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "Hey, you know we have a drink named after you."

The grasshopper replies, "Cool! Give me a Jamal!"

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Britney Spears!
Knock knock!
... Who's there?
Oops I did it again!

Joke: Thomas has been feeling sick lately so he goes to his doctor. After he receives his check-up his doctor calls him in "Tom, I've got some bad for you..."

Tom quickly asks "What is it?!"

The doctor tells him "You have about twelve to live."

Thomas waits a moment and asks "Twelve what? Years? Months? Weeks?"

The doctor continues "Eight! Seven! Six!..."