Blonde Jokes

 

10 ratings
4 saves

Joke: A blonde goes to the doctor and tells him she has been extremely moody lately and can't control her temper.

He suggests, "Sounds like stress. You should try getting some exercise. Run 10 miles a day and call me in a couple of weeks."

She does this and calls him in a couple of weeks, "I've been running every day and I do feel a little better."

He asks her, "And how's your family?"

She replies, "How would I know? I'm 140 miles away."


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9 ratings
7 saves

Joke: A blonde, brunette, and a red head are stuck on the roof of a house. Fire fighters are holding a blanket for them to jump onto. They tell the brunette to jump to safety. When she jumps they pull the blanket away and she hurts her butt.

Next the fire fighters tell the red head she needs to jump or she'll never get down. She refuses because she is scared they will pull the blanket away. They tell her "It was an accident." So she jumps and they pull the blanket away. She hurts her butt and yells at them.

Finally the blonde gets smart and tells them "I know what you're going to do. Just lay the blanket on the ground and back away."


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19 ratings
3 saves

Joke: A man goes on a date with a blonde woman. She asks him, "Do you have any kids?"

He tells her, "I have one that's under two."

The blonde replies, "I know I'm blonde, but I know how much one is."


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29 ratings
5 saves

Joke: A blonde was taking helicopter lessons and she was finally ready to try it on her own. The instructor told her to radio him every 1000 feet to make sure everything was okay.

At 1000 feet she radioed him, "Everything is fine."

At 2000 feet she radioed him, "Everything is fine, just getting a little cold."

But before she reached 3000 feet the helicopter began to slowly come down. It crashed into the ground ruining the helicopter, but the blonde was fine. The instructor ran to her side to comfort her, "What happened?"

She replied, "I told you it was getting cold. So I shut off the giant fan."


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13 ratings
3 saves

Joke: Why can't blondes add 10 + 2?


Punch line: They can't find the '10' button on a calculator.


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