Blonde Jokes

 

15 ratings
3 saves

Joke: How do you get a blonde to look into the air?


Punch line: Say "Look! A dead bird."


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20 ratings
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Joke: A blonde, brunette, and red head are all spies and are caught behind enemy lines. They are all tied up in front of a firing squad.

As they are about to shoot the brunette yells "Tornado! Tornado!" All of the men run off to wait the tornado out and the brunette manages to escape.

Seeing what she had done the red head devises her own plan and when they return she yells "Earthquake! Earthquake!" Again all of the men scatter to wait it out and the red head escapes.

The blonde, being the genius she is, devises her own plan. As soon as the men return she yells "Fire! Fire!"


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17 ratings
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Joke: A blonde, brunette, and red head are all talking about what their dreams were when they were kids. The brunette says, "I wanted to be a princess. I was so dumb."

The red head says, "I wanted to be a movie star. I was so crazy."

The blonde says, "I wanted to be the first person to travel around the sun, but I still haven't given up."

The brunette tells her, "If you came that close to the sun you would burn."

The blonde laughs at her, "That's why I would go at night!"


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19 ratings
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Joke: A blonde walks into a store and shows a clerk she would like a particular TV. He tells her, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

Enraged she goes home, dyes her hair, and returns the next day. She approaches another salesman and shows him the TV. He tells her, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

Angry, she says, "How did you know I was blonde?"

He replies, "That's not a TV, it's a microwave."


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8 ratings
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Joke: A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having their lunches. The blonde little girl says, "I'm sick of PB&J, we should all jump off the school tomorrow if we get it again tomorrow." The other girls agree.

The next day they all meet up on the roof of the school and open their lunch boxes to expose three PB&J sandwiches. So they all jump.

That night at the hospital the families of the girls are in the waiting room. The brunette and red headed girl's parents are crying, but the blonde girls parents are silent and confused. The other parents approach them and ask them why they are acting so strangely. The blonde mother responds, "I just don't understand. She makes her own lunch."


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