Short Jokes

Joke: Two blondes are hanging out and one of them pulls out a make up mirror. She is stunned saying "There's a face in there. She looks so familiar."

Her friend grabs the mirror, looks in it, and says "You're such an idiot. That's me!"

Joke: A man and his wife are listening to a guy explain his religious beliefs saying, "Every time you die you are reincarnated as a different creature."

His wife replies, "I want to be a cow!"

The man says, "No, a different one."

Joke: A man and his wife are both mathematicians. He is leaving for the store so he asks his wife if she wants anything. She yells in his face, "4!"

He wonders why she yelled at him, but thinks for a moment and brings back two dozen eggs.

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Knock.
Knock who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Knock.
Knock who?
(Keep this going as long as you possibly can.)

Joke: In the middle of a flight a man stands up, turns around, and yells, "Hijack!"

Everybody freaks out. Men begin to cower and women begin to weep. Suddenly a man in the back of the plane stands up and says, "Hi Ahmed! How are the kids?"