Rat maze

Question: A rat is placed at the beginning of a maze and must make it to the end. There are four paths at the start that he has an equal chance of taking: path A takes 5 minutes and leads to the end, path B takes 8 minutes and leads to the start, path C takes 3 minutes and leads to the end, and path D takes 2 minutes and leads to the start.

What is the expected amount of time it will take for the rat to finish the maze?

Question: Your friend tells you about a story he once tried to impress a young lady with, but instead got a slap in the face. He wants you to attempt to see the flaw: It was a hot and windless day, in our bunker, when suddenly one of ours yelled: "Enemy!" We opened fire on them, leaving one hundred of them dead before they retreated. I was checking a dead captain's glasses when the shout came that they were incoming again, and the CO ordered us to open up on them with our mortars, when I yelled: "Cease fire! They're Americans!" Later, an American colonel thanked me for my work after I said that I saw their flag, waving back and forth in the wind. What is wrong with this story?

Question: What tastes better than it smells?

Question: What goes in the water black and comes out red?

Question: What loses its head in the morning and gets it back at night?

Question: What two things can you never eat for breakfast?