Good Jokes

Joke: Chuck Norris urinated near a truck once. We now know that truck as Optimus Prime.

Joke: "Hey Mom?" asked Little Johnny, "Can you give me $20?"

"Certainly not," She replied.

"If you do," he went on, "I'll tell you what Dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop."

His mother's ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he say?"

"He said, 'Hey Maria, could you make sure I've got clean socks tomorrow.'"

Joke: I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me... Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Phillip!
Phillip who?
Fill up your pool! I wanna take a dip!

Joke: What has a bottom at its top?