Good Jokes

Joke: Why does Earth make fun of all of the other planets?

Joke: One morning before a man leaves for work his wife asks him "Honey, do you know what today is?"

He nervously responds "Of course I do!" Then he leaves for work.

Throughout the day he sends his wife flowers, chocolate, and a card telling her to meet him at a certain expensive restaurant for dinner.

When he meets her at the restaurant she runs up to him and says "This has been the best Independence Day of my life!"

Joke: Friend: Why did you break up with her? She was beautiful, funny, and she had a great job!
Statistician: Exactly, she was an outlier.

Joke: Chuck Norris urinated near a truck once. We now know that truck as Optimus Prime.

Joke: It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.