Good Jokes

Joke: How is a wife like a hand grenade?

Joke: yo mama is so fat, they use her as a map in call of duty!

Joke: Yo mama's so ugly, last time I saw something as ugly as her, I pinned a tail on it!

Joke: An old couple is sitting on their couch and the woman asks her husband "If I die will you get married again."

The husband replies "Well I don't want to be lonely... So yes."

His wife shoots him a dirty look and says "Will you live in our house?"

The husband replies "Well it's already paid off... So yes."

His wife is extremely mad at this point. She asks him "Will she use my golf clubs?!"

The husband replies "Oh no... She's left handed."

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Felix!
Felix who?
Felix my ice cream I'll be very upset.