Good Jokes

Joke: A gymnast walks into a bar... She gets deducted 5 points.

Joke: A man bought a golden ring for his blind wife at night. “I brought something for you. You might like it,” the man said. “What is it honey?” his wife asked. “It’s the Golden Ring,” the man replied. “Oh, sound’s good. Can I wear it now?” the wife asked. “Sure, it’s yours,” the man said. He took it from the box but it fell. He crawled and searched for the ring but something told him that the ring was not around in this area. So he sprinted outside where the streetlights were and he started to do the same thing again. A moment later, Mr Mallard (The man’s neighbour) was walking down the street and saw the man crawling. “Are you finding something, Daniel?” Mr Mallard asked. “Oh yes, I’m finding the golden ring,” Daniel replied. “Where did you lose it?” Mr Mallard asked. “I lost it at home,” Daniel replied. “So, why don’t you find it at home then?” Mr Mallard asked. “Well, there were no lights in my house and it’s really dark,” Daniel replied. “You lost that ring in your house. So you’ll probably find it around somewhere where you lost it,” Mr Mallard said. “You know that my eyes don’t work very well and the doctor told me not to search anything in the dark whether it's really important or not. I’ll knock my head again if I don't listen to him. I can't believe it. He was right. He'll be proud of me if I tell him what I did now,” Daniel cried.

Joke: What are the strongest days of the week?

Joke: Teacher: Johnny, what is the definition of infinity?

Joke: 1. You can't wash yours eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breath through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried # 3. 6. When you did 3 you realized it was possible, but you looked like a dog when you did it. 7. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 8. You skipped # 5. 9. You just checked to see if there was a 5. Add a comment if I got you!