Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: Why did the tea fall down a hill?


Punch line: Too steep!


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Joke: A man a his wife are having dinner when a beautiful woman approaches their table and kissed the man on the cheek and walks away. His wife asks, "Who the hell was that?"

He replies, "My mistress..."

His wife shouts, "What? I want a divorce!"

He calmly replies, "Fine. But remember, you signed a prenup. If we get divorced that means no more vacations, no more shopping trips, no more credit cards, and no more beautiful house or car. But it's up to you."

She looks at him for a moment then notices one of their mutual friends entering with a beautiful lady, "Who's that with John?" she asks.

He tells her, "That's his mistress."

His wife smiles, "Ours is prettier."


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Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Mayonnaise!
Mayonnaise who?
Mayonnaise a lot of people in here!


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Joke: What do you call a 5' 2" psychic that just escaped from prison?


Punch line: A small medium at large.


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Joke: Why do NSA agents make great companions?


Punch line: They listen to everything you say.


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