Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: A blonde wife texts her husband while he is at work saying "Windows frozen."

He responds "Pour some room temperature water over it."

She texts him "No longer frozen, computers dead."


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Joke: A teacher walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have just have a soda?"

The barkeep replies, "I don't know, CAN YOU?"


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Joke: What is a polar bear's favorite food?


Punch line: A burrrr-ito.


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Joke: Thomas has tried out for every school play since 2nd grade and he finally gets a part. He rushes home and yells to his father, "I got a part! I got a part!"

His dad asks him, "Oh yeah? Who do you play?"

His son replies, "I play a man who's been married for 30 years with 4 children."

The father says, "Oh, I'm sorry son. Maybe next time you'll get a speaking part."


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Joke: Who is a chicken's favorite composer?


Punch line: Bach.


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