Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: A little boy is out in the yard with his grandpa. The boy finds a worm and tells his grandpa, "Hey grandpa! Bet ya five bucks I can get the worm back into its hole."

The grandpa, knowing it is too limp to go back in the hole agrees. The boy runs into the house and comes out with a can of hairspray. He sprays the worm until it is stiff and puts it easily back into its hole and looks to his grandpa, "Pay up!"

His grandpa hands him five dollars and heads inside with the hairspray. Thirty minutes later he comes back out and he hands the boy another five dollars.

The boy replies, "Grandpa, you already gave me the money. Don't you remember?"

His grandpa replies, "Yeah I know, that's from grandma."


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Joke: What do you call a happy cowboy?


Punch line: A jolly rancher!


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Joke: A nun in the convent walked into the bathroom where mother superior was taking a shower. "There is a blind man to see you." she says. "Well, if he is a blind man, than it does not matter if I'm in the shower. Send him in."

The blind man walks into the bathroom, and mother superior starts to tell him how much she appreciates him working at the convent for them. She goes on and on and 10 minutes later the man interrupts: "That's nice and all, ma'am, but you can put your clothes on now. Where do you want me to put these blinds?"


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Joke: What's the difference between a jazz and rock guitarist?


Punch line: A rock guitarist plays 10 chords for 100,000 people and a jazz guitarist plays 100,000 chords for 10 people.


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Joke: How do you make 5 pounds of fat attractive?


Punch line: Put a nipple on it!


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