Dirty Jokes

Joke: What did the blonde ask when her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

Joke: How did the guy go to the costume party as premature ejaculation?

Joke: A man and woman are sitting next to each other on a train. The woman sneezes, shudders violently, then wipes her nose. The man takes notice but doesn't say anything because he doesn't want to be rude.

Five minutes later she sneezes again, violently shudders, and wipes her nose. The man becomes curious and asks her, "I couldn't help but notice every time you sneeze you shudder violently."

She replies, "Yeah, I have a rare disease. Every time I sneeze I have an orgasm."

He blushes, "Oh, do you take anything for it?"

She shakes her head, "Yeah, pepper."

Joke: A man and his wife have a big argument. She yells at him and tells him to get out.

He grabs his stuff and starts to walk out the door and she yells to him, "I hope you have a slow painful death bastard!"

He yells back to her, "Now you want me to stay?!"

Joke: How many guys in the friend zone it take to screw in a light bulb?