Funny Jokes

Joke: What is the only kind of nail carpenters don't like to hammer?

Joke: Why can't blondes add 10 + 2?

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Gone up!
Gone up who?
The bathroom is that way...

Joke: Student: Would you ever punish someone for something they didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not!
Student: Okay good, because my homework isn't done yet.

Joke: Thomas has been feeling sick lately so he goes to his doctor. After he receives his check-up his doctor calls him in "Tom, I've got some bad for you..."

Tom quickly asks "What is it?!"

The doctor tells him "You have about twelve to live."

Thomas waits a moment and asks "Twelve what? Years? Months? Weeks?"

The doctor continues "Eight! Seven! Six!..."