Question: A bank is getting robbed and one of the robbers tells one of the tellers to give him all of the money. The teller tells him she doesn't have access to it.
Suddenly the phone rings. The robber tells the teller to answer it and not give them away. She picks up the phone and it happens to be her mother. She tells her mother "Is this an emergency mom? Call me when I get home, I could use some help painting." Then she hangs up.
The robbers continue to try to get into the vault but twenty minutes later the police show up with the tellers mom and arrest them all.
How did the police know about the robbery?
Answer: The teller used the mute button on the phone so her mother only heard "Emergency... Call... Help." This is how she knew to call the police.
Question: There are four men: Abe, Butch, Cam, and Dan. There are four hats: two white and two black. They each get a hat: Abe gets black, Butch gets white, Cam gets black, and Dan gets white. They don't know what hat color they have. Abe goes into a room so that no one can see his hat. The others line up in front of the door in the order Butch, Cam, and Dan (Butch can't see the others hats, Cam can see Butch's, and Dan can see Cam and Butch's hats). Whoever can figure out their hat color first wins $1,000. If they are wrong they are out of the running.
Which man can figure out his hat color without a doubt?
Answer: Cam can figure it out. If Dan saw that Cam and Butch had the same color hat he would know his hat color. Since he doesn't quickly figure out his hat color, Cam knows that him and Butch don't have the same hat color. So all he has to do is say that his hat color is the opposite of Butch's hat color (after giving enough time to be sure that Dan doesn't know his own color).
Question: First think of a person who lives in disguise,
who deals in secrets and tells naught but lies.
Next tell me what is always the last thing to mend,
the middle of middle the end of the end?
And finally give me a sound often heard during the search of a hard-to-find word.
Now string them together and answer me this,
which creature would you be unwilling to kiss?
Answer: A spider (spy-der).
Question: Thomas has missed an excessive number of days of school, so he must meet with Principal Davis. Mr. Davis asks him "Why on Earth have you missed so many days?"
Thomas replies "There just isn't enough time for school. I need 8 hours of sleep a day, which adds up to about 122 days a year. Weekends off is 104 days a year. Summer vacation is about 60 days. If I spend about an hour on each meal, that's 3 hours a day or 45 days a year. I need at least 2 hours of exercise and relaxation time each day to stay physically and mentally fit, adding another 30 days.
Add all of that up and you get about 361 days. That only leaves 4 days for school."
The principal knows Thomas is full of it, but can't figure out why. Where is Thomas going wrong?
Answer: There are two reasons:
First, Thomas is double counting a lot of the days. A lot of the time spent sleeping, eating, and relaxing occurs during weekends and the summer. Weekends also occur during the summer, so all of these hours are getting counted several times.
Secondly, school isn't an all day thing. So the 4 days actually represents more days of school. If school is 6 hours per day, those four days represents 16 days of school.
Question: A fast food restaurant sells chicken in orders of 6, 9, and 20.
What is the largest number of pieces of chicken you cannot order from this restaurant?
After 6 all numbers divisible by 3 can be ordered (because they can all be expressed as a sum of 6's and 9's). After 26, all numbers divisible by three when subtracted by 20 can be obtained. After 46, all numbers divisible by three when subtracted by 40 can be obtained. After 46, all numbers fit into one of these 3 categories, so all numbers can be obtained. 43 is the last number that doesn't fall into one of these categories (44 = 20 + 6 * 4, 45 = 6 * 6 + 9).
Question: A man is in court for killing his wife. In the closing statements the man's lawyer surprises everyone when he announces "His wife was just missing. Everyone look at those doors. His wife is going to walk in those doors in about 30 seconds."The entire court is silent and the jury stares at the door as the lawyer and the defendant stare at them. After a couple of minutes the lawyer says "See! If you were so sure he killed his wife, you wouldn't be watching that door!"The jury goes into deliberation and comes back almost immediately with a guilty verdict.Why did the jury convict him?
Answer: The defendant (guilty man) wasn't looking at the door. He knew his wife wasn't coming.
Question: Someone posts that they are giving away a free $100 to whoever shows them they deserves it. One person posts (the post receives 1 point):
Don't give it to me, other people deserve it more.
The next person posts (the person also receives 1 point):
If you give me the money I'll spend it to make the world a better place
The final person posts a picture of a cat. His post gets -1 point.
When somebody dislikes you comment you lose a point and when somebody likes it you gain a point. You can also vote on your own.
Who gets the money?
Answer: The person with the cat picture. The other two people voted everyone's post down and voted their own up. But The guy with the cat picture voted everybody's post up.
Question: A man was born on January 1st, 23 B.C. and died January 2nd, 23 A.D. How old did he live to be?
Answer: 45 years old.
There is no year 0 so you can add 23 to 23 but you must subtract one to take year 0 out of consideration: 23 + 23 - 1 = 45 years old. In some cultures people are born 1 years old, in this case they would be 46 years old when they die.
Question: A smooth dance, a ball sport, a place to stay, an Asian country, and a girl's name.
What's her name?
Hint: Think the NATO phonetic alphabet.
Answer: Juliet, all of the listed things describe a part of the NATO phonetic alphabet: Foxtrot, golf, hotel, India, and finally Juliet.
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