Long Jokes

Joke: A truck driver stops at a restaurant to get some food and rest. A gang of bikers approach him while he's eating and start to mess with him. They call him names and throw food at him but he doesn't do anything about it. When he's finished he pays his bill and leaves.

After he leaves one of the bikers says, "Well he isn't much of a man is he?"

The waitress says, "He isn't much of a truck driver either. He just ran over 20 motorcycles on his way out."

Joke: A man meets the best Bible salesman in the world. The salesman greets him, "Nuh, nuh, nuh, nice to meet you."

The man asks him, "If you don't mind me asking, what's your secret?"

The salesman replies, "It's suh, suh, suh, simple. I juh, juh, just go to the duh, duh, duh, door and suh, say, 'Duh, duh, duh, do you wuh, wuh, want to buh, buh, buh, buh, buy a bible? Or wuh, would you luh, luh, luh, like muh, me to ruh, ruh, ruh, ruh, read it to you?'"

Joke: A man is getting into a nice warm bath to relax. Once he is situated he hears the doorbell ring. He is mad but he gets up and dries off. As he is walking to the door he falls to the ground hurting his back. When he finally gets to the door the person at the door says "Oh, sorry. I think I'm at the wrong house."

The man is angry so he yells "Are you serious?"

The person at the door replies "Chill out man, you need to take a hot bath or something."

Joke: A foreign woman walked into a hairdresser shop while she was on holiday. "Can you cut my hair into-" she pointed at a lady posing for the style in a picture. "-that style?" "We only do it with bangs," the hairdresser replied irritably. "Boss said so. Don't know why. People these days." "Ok." So the foreign customer went to the shop and bought some gunpowder. An hour later, in the storeroom, the boss heard a bang. "People these days," said she.

Joke: A blonde girl is standing next to her school's flagpole. The janitor comes up to her and asks her what she's doing. She replies "I have to find the height of the flagpole for math class."

With this the janitor unscrews the flagpole and lays it down on the ground. He measures it with a measuring tape and tells her "Twenty-five feet, five inches."

She thanks him but as he is walking away she says "What a dummy. I wanted the height, not the width."