Good Jokes

Joke: The big bad wolf sneaks up behind the horny Little Red Riding Hood and tells her they're going to have sex. She reaches in her picnic basket and pulls out a gun and says, "no, you're not you're going to eat me just like the book says".

Joke: A man was having trouble paying his water bill. He tried and tried to make ends meet, but nothing seemed to work. He went over to his neighbor's house. He says to him, "Hey, man. I'm barely making it on my water bill every month. It's getting to be a real hassle. Can you help a neighbor out? I'll do whatever I can to pay you back. I'll mow your grass, walk your dog, babysit your kids. You name it, I'll do it!" The neighbor ponders for a moment and says, "You know what? You got yourself a deal! You can start with the grass this Saturday and you'll do the rest later on." The man, who is now full of excitement, exclaims, "Sounds good!" Several days go by and the man does everything that his neighbor asked of him. It's about 3 in the afternoon on a Thursday and he goes to check the mailbox and he sees a letter from his neighbor. He heads into the house and sits down at his dining room table. He begins to open the letter and starts reading it. It says: "Hey, neighbor! I wanted to thank you for everything you did! Also, I am still sorry to hear that you are having problems with your water bill. Hope things get better for you! Get well soon! With deepest sympathy, Your Neighbor."

Joke: Why did the boy put sugar on his pillow?

Joke: Did you hear about the new Anti-Gravity book ?

Joke: If alcohol and driving don't mix, why does my car run off of ethanol?