Good Jokes

 

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Joke: A woman is pulled over and the officer asks her for her license. He looks at it and says "Ma'm, your license says you should be wearing glasses?"

The woman replies "I have contacts sir."

The officer gets mad and yells "I don't care who you know, you're getting a ticket!"


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Joke: A 90 year old woman goes on a date with a 91 year old man. When she gets home to her daughter she tells her "I had to slap him 4 times."

The daughter asks "Was he getting fresh?"

The old woman replies "No, I thought he had expired!"


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Joke: Why didn't the chicken not cross the road?


Punch line: So he wouldn't get laughed at.


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Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Queen
Queen who?
Queen yourself, I can smell you through the door.


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Joke: What kind of key doesn't open a lock?


Punch line: A monkey.


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