Good Jokes

 

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Joke: The captain of a pirate ship is under attack one day and he tells his first mate to bring him his red shirt. The mate asks him "Why did you want your red shirt?"

The captain replied "Never let your enemy see you bleed!"

The next day somebody spots 200 ships coming their way. The captain sighs and says "Bring me my brown pants!"


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Joke: A king is about to go to war so he locks up his beautiful wife and hands his best friend a key, "If I'm not back in 4 days, she's yours."

The king rides off to war, but he immediately sees his friend riding up beside him. "What's wrong?" Demands the king.

His friend replies with labored breath, "Wrong key."


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Joke: Yesterday Chuck Norris made the statement "1 plus 1 equals 3."

In other news all mathematical proofs were disproved today by contradiction.


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Joke: How can you explain Santa Claus mathematically?


Punch line: The integral of 3x2 from 0 to 'Ho!'.


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Joke: Chuck Norris has never had an eating disorder. He has however, eaten disorder.


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