Good Jokes

 

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Joke: A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "The driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."


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Joke: Yo mama's so stupid she tried to drown her pet fish.


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Joke: An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders 1/2 a beer, the third orders 1/3 a beer, the fourth orders 1/4 a beer. The bartender interrupts "Get out! Are you trying to suck me dry?"


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Joke: What did the proton say to the other proton?


Punch line: I find you repulsive.


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Joke: What do you call a secret agent compound?


Punch line: Bond, Ionic bond. Taken, not shared.


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