Good Jokes

Joke: A picture is worth a thousand words, but if Chuck Norris doesn't like it it is worth a thousand roundhouse kicks to the face.

Joke: An Englishman is walking down the Irish countryside and stops at a river to take a drink. He cups a hand and gets some water. Just as he is about to drink a shepherd yells to him in a thick Irish accent, "Don't drink out the river, it's full of sheep pee!"

The Englishman replies, "I don't understand a word you are saying. I'm English. What'd you say?"

The shepherd replies, "Use both hands, you'll get more that way."

Joke: What do you call a cow that has no legs?

Joke: "Go!" is the shortest sentence in the English language. What's the longest?

Joke: What did the noodles say to the butter?