Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: Have you heard that kangaroos can jump higher than a two-story house?


Punch line: This is primarily because of their long legs. And the fact that houses can't jump.


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Joke: What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?


Punch line: Oh sheet!


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Joke: I just invented a word...


Punch line: Plagiarism.


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Joke: Late one night in the insane asylum, one inmate suddenly yelled out, "I am Napoleon!" The inmate in the room next to his asked, "How do you know?" The first inmate replied, "God told me." Then, someone else shouted out, "I did NOT!!"


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Joke: A man walks into the bar and says, "Pour me a stiff one! Just got into another fight with the old lady."

The bartender asks him, "How'd it end this time?"

The man replies, "She came crawling back to me on her hands and knees."

The bartender is surprised, "Wow, that's a change. What'd she say?"

The man says, "She said, 'Come out from under there, you little bitch.'"


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