Funny Jokes

Joke: A cop is doing his regular patrol and sees a car parked in the lover's lane with the windows all steamy. He approaches the car and knocks on the window. "Can I help you officer?" the boy inside the car asks the officer.

The cop replies, "Uh, yeah. What are you guys doing out here so late?"

The boy replies, "I'm just reading a book. She's back there playing games on her phone, I think."

The cop asks him, "Son, have you been drinking?"

The boy replies, "No way, I'm only twenty."

The cop looks to the girl, "And how old is she?"

The guy checks him phone, "Sir, in ten minutes she will be eighteen."

Joke: Why is the sky covered with clouds when it is storming?

Joke: Two men are walking by a restaurant and one of them says, "That smells amazing! Lets get something."

The other man replies, "But they don't let dogs in, what are we going to do with them."

The first man puts on a pair of sunglasses and has his friend do the same and says, "Follow my lead."

He starts to walk into the restaurant and the waiter stops him, "You cannot bring dogs in here sir."

The man gets offended, "Excuse me sir! This is my seeing eye dog, I am blind."

The waiter questions this, "But your dog is a pit bull?"

The man replies, "I know, I am a very important person, I need protection as well."

The first man passes through and the second man begins to walk through when the waiter stops him and asks him the same question. The man replies, "This is my seeing eye dog too."

The waiter replies, "Really? A chihuahua?"

The man freaks out, "What?! They gave me a chihuahua?!"

Joke: Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

Joke: There are three men in a truck driving in a desert. Their names are Manners, Poo, and Shut Up.

Poo falls out of the truck but nobody notices. They finally stop at a gas station and Manners goes back to look for Poo while Shut Up waits at the station.

A policeman approaches Shut Up and asks "What's your name?" He replies "Shut Up." The policeman asks again "What's your name?!" He replies "Shut Up!" Annoyed, the policeman asks "Where are your manners?"

He replies "Gone picking up Poo."