Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: A blonde girl is standing next to her school's flagpole. The janitor comes up to her and asks her what she's doing. She replies "I have to find the height of the flagpole for math class."

With this the janitor unscrews the flagpole and lays it down on the ground. He measures it with a measuring tape and tells her "Twenty-five feet, five inches."

She thanks him but as he is walking away she says "What a dummy. I wanted the height, not the width."


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Joke: A foreign woman walked into a hairdresser shop while she was on holiday. "Can you cut my hair into-" she pointed at a lady posing for the style in a picture. "-that style?" "We only do it with bangs," the hairdresser replied irritably. "Boss said so. Don't know why. People these days." "Ok." So the foreign customer went to the shop and bought some gunpowder. An hour later, in the storeroom, the boss heard a bang. "People these days," said she.


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Joke: A man is going around stealing all of the toilets at police stations.

Police have nothing to go on.


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Joke: How is life like a box of chocolates?


Punch line: It's expensive, you don't like half of it, and even if you give it all to a girl she still might not have sex with you.


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Joke: What is the only kind of nail carpenters don't like to hammer?


Punch line: Fingernails.


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