Funny Jokes

Joke: A lady walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic. He asks her, "Why would you want arsenic?"

She replies, "To kill my husband!"

He replies, "I'm not selling you arsenic for that!"

She hands him a photo of her husband with his wife in bed. The pharmacist replies, "Oh, I didn't know you had a prescription!"

Joke: Three statisticians go hunting together and spot a deer. The first one aims and overshoots slightly. The second aims and undershoots slightly. The third one throws his gun down and yells "we got him!"

Joke: A snail walks into a car dealership and asks them if he could get an 'S' painted on the hood of a particular car. The salesman asks him why and he responds "I want people to yell 'Look at that S car go!'"

Joke: How do you get a blonde with one arm out of a tree?

Joke: What kind of car did Jesus drive?