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Joke: He had this one night stand.


Punch line: He bought two night stands but only one would fit.


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Joke: He ran over himself.


Punch line: Because no one would go to the store for him.


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Joke: 1,000,000 seconds = approx 11.5 days Add 3 more zero's to change 1 million to 1 billion. (Its only 3 more zero's right?) 1,000,000,000 seconds = approx 31.7 years. Now add 3 more zero's changing 1 billion into 1 trillion. (Its only 3 more zero's right?) 1,000,000,000,000 seconds = approx 31.7 thousand years. Now you know.


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Joke: Do you know why they outlawed the "wave" at Prineville and La Pines school sports events? (You can use names of your local towns.)


Punch line: Because two students drowned.


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Joke: At school, when little Johny sees little Suzy he asks her if she'll climb the flag pole. When she tells him "No", he offers her $1 to climb it. She says "Yes". That night she tells her mother how she made $1 today by climbing the flag pole for little Johny. Her mother tells her not to do it again because all little Johny wants to do is see her underwear. Next day same thing happens. But when little Johny asks her to climb it for $1 and she says "No", he offers her $2 and she says "Yes". Again, she tells her mother this time how she made $2 climbing the flag pole. Her mother yells at her and tells her not to do it again because all little Johny wants to do is see her underwear. Next day same thing happens. But when little Johny offers her $1 to climb it and she says "No", he offers her $2 again but she still says "No". This time he offers her $5 and she says "Yes". Again, she tells her mother this time how she made $5 climbing the flag pole. "That's it!" Her mother yells at her and tells her and now she's in big trouble. She says, "wait, mommy this time I tricked him". Her mother asks her how and she tells her this time she didn't wear any underwear!


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