Funny Jokes

Joke: Chemist 1: Did you know they discovered a new element?
Chemist 2: No, what's it called?
Chemist 1: It's symbol is Ah.
Chemist 2: Oh... The element of surprise.

Joke: Teacher: If I say 'I am very beautiful', what tense is that in?
Student: It must be past.

Joke: What do pirates say on their 80th birthday?

Joke: What's the best part thing about alphabet soup?

Joke: A beautiful blonde woman approaches a pharmacist and asks, "Do you have extra large condoms?"

The pharmacist replies, "Yes, isle 11."

The blonde goes to the isle. But about 30 minutes later she is still looking at the condoms. The pharmacist calls over to her, "Do you need some help?"

The woman replies, "No, I'm just waiting for somebody to buy some."