Dirty Jokes

Joke: What did a saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

Joke: Anthony and Maria get married but they can't afford a honeymoon, so they end up going to Maria's parents house for their first night. The next morning Timmy, Maria's little brother, goes to the kitchen for breakfast and asks him mother, "Are Tony and Maria up yet?"

His mother replies, "No."

Timmy says, "Do you want to know what I think?"

His mother replies, "No! I don't want to know what you think. Go to school."

Timmy comes home for lunch and asks, "Are Tony and Maria up yet?"

His mother replies, "No."

Timmy says, "Do you want to know what I think?"

His mother replies, "No I do not, go back to school!"

Timmy comes home after school and asks his mother, "Are Tony and Maria up yet?"

His mother replies, "No."

Timmy says, "Do you want to know what I think?"

His mother replies, "Fine! What do you think?"

Timmy replies, "Last night Tony came into my room for some Vaseline, and I think I gave him super glue."

Joke: Tom's wife has been in a coma for months. Her attendants have noticed that every time they wash her crotch she moves a little bit. Desperate, they ask Tom if he would perform oral sex on his wife in an attempt to wake her up. Tom agrees and asks for some privacy in the room. Soon after, he rushes out in a panic and says, "I think she's choking!"

Joke: What gets bigger every time you watch your neighbor's wife undress?

Joke: One of the professors at a university is well known for his sexist comments in class. One day, all of the women in the class gathered outside of the classroom and decided that the next time he made a sexist comment they would all walk out of the classroom.

The next day the professor was talking and made another sexist statement as expected, "You ladies will be happy to hear that the tribesmen have an average penis size of 12 inches."

With this all of the women walk out. He calls to them, "Girls! Wait! The next flight doesn't leave for a few hours!"