Dirty Jokes

Joke: A man explains to his girlfriend that his pants were especially made for dancing. She asks him, "Ballroom?"

He replies, "Not much."

Joke: What's the difference between hard and light?

Joke: A man goes into a library and asks the librarian, "Do you have any books for dudes with little dicks?"

She replies, "We have one, I don't know if it's not in yet."

The guy frowns, "That's the one..."

Joke: A man in a restaurant sees an extremely attractive woman sitting alone, so he decides to send her a nice bottle of wine. The waiter brings the wine to the lady. The lady looks at the bottle for a moment and sends a message back to the man. It reads: 'For me to accept this bottle of wine you must have a Mercedes in your garage, a few million dollars in your bank, and seven inches in your pants.'

He reads the message, laughs, and sends back one of his own: 'Just send it back. I have a Ferrari, Mercedes, and a Corvette. I have twenty million in the bank and a house in Aspen, LA, and Miami. But I will NEVER cut three inches off for any woman.'

Joke: What happened to the case of the hole in the university's girl's locker room?