Clean Jokes

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pizza!
Pizza who?
Pete's a great guy! You should meet him.

Joke: A guy takes his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. After the game he asks her, "So what'd you think?"

She replies, "I like the tights and the muscles, but all of that commotion over 25 cents?"

He asks her what she means. She replies, "At the beginning they toss a quarter and one team gets it. Then they spend the rest of the game yelling, 'Get the quarter back!'"

Joke: After Beethoven died music could be heard from his grave. People gathered around and they could hear his 8th symphony playing in reverse... Then the 7th... And the 6th. Suddenly the priest realized what was happening and made an announcement, "Everything is okay people! It's just Beethoven decomposing."

Joke: A blonde woman has lived in Russia for many years. One day a government official comes to her and tells her, "Miss, quite a while back there was an error by a surveyor. You actually live in Ukraine."

The blonde replies, "Thank god! I don't think I could make it through one more Russian winter."

Joke: A man goes to a coffee shop and asks the blonde waitress, "Can I have a coffee with sugar, no cream?"

The waitress replies, "Oh, I'm so sorry sir. We don't have cream. Could I get it to you with no milk instead?"