Clean Jokes

Joke: A police officer was interviewing a bank teller after they had been robbed 3 days in a row. The officer asked "What did he look like?"

The teller responded "He looked better every time he came here."

Joke: Tom walks into his boss' office and tells him, "Sir, I know things are going the best around here but I have three companies that have contacted me recently. I would like a raise."

His boss agrees and after debating the amount for a while they agree on a 5 percent raise. When Tom gets up to leave his boss asks him, "What companies contacted you?"

Tom smiles and says, "The cable, electric, and water company."

Joke: A new father is sitting down with his father for a drink. His dad tells him, "Now that you're a father yourself it's time I give you something."

He replies, "Dad, you're not talking about-."

His father interrupts, "Yes. It's time." With this he hands him a copy of '1000 Dad Jokes, 6th Edition' to his son.

He says with a tear in his eye, "Dad, I'm honored."

"Hi honored," his father replies, "I'm dad."

Joke: How does a farmer address a turkey problem?

Joke: A statistician is going through security in an airport. They discover a bomb in his luggage. When they ask him about it he says "The chances a bomb are on a plane is 1/10000, but the chances that two are on the plane is 1/100000000. Just trying to be safe."