Chemistry Jokes

Joke: What did one ion say to the other ion?

Joke: Little Johnny's Chemistry teacher wanted to teach his class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he set up an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms. "Now, class. Observe what happens to the two the worms," said the professor putting the first worm in the glass of water. The worm in the water moved about, twisting and seemingly unharmed. He then dropped the second work in the whiskey glass. It writhed in pain for a moment, then quickly sank to the bottom and died. "Now kids, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" he asked. Little Johnny raised his hand and wisely responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

Joke: Why are protons more religious than photons?

Joke: A girl asks her brother, "What's the difference between socks and cellular division?"

To which he replies, "Not much, they both involve mitosis!"

Joke: Pascal, Newton, and Einstein decide to play hide-and-seek. Einstein is "it" first. Pascal runs and hides behind a tree. Newton stands right behind Einstein and draws a one meter by one meter square around himself.

Newton turns around and yells, "I found you, Pascal!"