Blonde Jokes

 

117 ratings
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Joke: Two sisters, one is blonde and one is brunette, are trying to start a farm. The brunette sister finds a prized bull in the classified and leaves to check it out. She tells the blonde that she will contact her to come haul the bull back to the farm if she decides to buy it.

The brunette goes to the farm and decides to buy it. The farmer tells her that the bull will cost exactly $599, no less. So she buys the bull and heads to town to contact her sister. The only person she can find to help her is a telegraph operator.

The operator tells her "It costs 99 cents per word, what would you like to send?"

The brunette replies "Well I only have $1 left." She thinks for a while and tells the operator she wants to send the word 'comfortable.'

The operator asks "How will she know you bought the bull and want her to bring the haul from the word comfortable?"

The blonde replies "She's a slow reader."


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32 ratings
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Joke: A blonde walks into a bar. Shortly after another blonde walks into a bar. Ten seconds later two more blondes walk into the bar.

You think they would have caught on after the first two blondes didn't duck.


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17 ratings
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Joke: A man comes home to his blonde wife crying violently. When he asks her what's wrong she replies "I've been working on this puzzle all day, but I can't figure it out! It's supposed to be a tiger."

Her husband grabs her hand gently and replies "Honey, put away the box of frosted flakes."


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Joke: What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?


Punch line: The winner of last year's hide-and-go-seek game.


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Joke: A blonde walks into a store and shows a clerk she would like a particular TV. He tells her, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

Enraged she goes home, dyes her hair, and returns the next day. She approaches another salesman and shows him the TV. He tells her, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

Angry, she says, "How did you know I was blonde?"

He replies, "That's not a TV, it's a microwave."


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