Short Jokes

 

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Joke: At first God created Adam but Adam was lonely. He asked God, "Can you give me somebody that will care for me, listen to me, love me, make me happy, and help me through tough situations?"

God replied, "Yeah, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg."

Adam then asked, "What can I get for a rib?"


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Joke: A man went to the dentist because he was missing some teeth. The dentist asks him, "How exactly did this happen?"

He replies, "My wife's bread is as hard as a rock!"

The dentist says, "You could have said no to eating it."

The man replies, "I know, how do you think this happened?"


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Joke: Two guys walk into a bar. They look to the right and see a doctor, a priest, and a Rabbi. They look ahead and see a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. They look to the left and see a genie, a chicken, and a salesman.

One of the guys turns to the other, "Lets get out of here. This place is a joke."


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Joke: Girlfriend: What are you doing?
Mathematician: Just wrestling with these unknowns in bed.
Girlfriend: What?!
Mathematician: Yeah. Just a minute ago I was working out some models.
*Hangs up*
Mathematician: Oh you thought... Hello?


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Joke: A blonde is driving down the road and sees another blonde in the middle of a field in a rowboat paddling as hard as she can.

The blonde pulls over, runs to the edge of the field and yells "It's stupid people like you that give blondes a bad name! If I could swim I would come out there and beat you up!"


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