Long Jokes

Joke: A little girl is digging a hole in her yard. Her neighbor looks over the fence and asks her what she's doing. She tells him, "I'm burying my goldfish."

The neighbor replies, "That's a mighty big hole for a little goldfish."

The little girl smiles at him and says, "Not if he's inside your cat."

Joke: Girlfriend: What are you doing?
Mathematician: Just wrestling with these unknowns in bed.
Girlfriend: What?!
Mathematician: Yeah. Just a minute ago I was working out some models.
*Hangs up*
Mathematician: Oh you thought... Hello?

Joke: A man went to the dentist because he was missing some teeth. The dentist asks him, "How exactly did this happen?"

He replies, "My wife's bread is as hard as a rock!"

The dentist says, "You could have said no to eating it."

The man replies, "I know, how do you think this happened?"

Joke: Two guys walk into a bar. They look to the right and see a doctor, a priest, and a Rabbi. They look ahead and see a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. They look to the left and see a genie, a chicken, and a salesman.

One of the guys turns to the other, "Lets get out of here. This place is a joke."

Joke: At first God created Adam but Adam was lonely. He asked God, "Can you give me somebody that will care for me, listen to me, love me, make me happy, and help me through tough situations?"

God replied, "Yeah, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg."

Adam then asked, "What can I get for a rib?"