Good Jokes

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Irish Stu!
Irish Stu who?
Irish Stu in the name of the law!
Irish Stu = I arrest you.

Joke: What are all of Jaws clothes made out of?

Joke: Mississippi, how do you spell it?

Joke: Three men were told by God, " If you step on a duck, you shall marry the ugliest woman. However, if you do not step on a duck, you shall marry the most beautiful woman in all the land." The three men accepted. The first man stepped on a duck from not paying attention. The second man accidentally stepped on a duck in his son's room. The third man never stepped on a duck yet he was married to an ugly woman. He exclaims to God, "I have not stepped on a duck, why is my wife ugly?" Why has God given him an ugly wife?

Joke: A woman walks up to the checkout line at a store with these items: 2% milk, bread, Pepsi, macaroni, and cookies. She sees a drunk man. The man says "You must be single."

The woman is startled. How could he have known? He didn't see her hands and the man couldn't have figured it out from her items. "How did you know?" she asked.

He replied, "Cause your ugly!"