Good Jokes

Joke: Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
w-h-o.

Joke: There are three men in a truck driving in a desert. Their names are Manners, Poo, and Shut Up.

Poo falls out of the truck but nobody notices. They finally stop at a gas station and Manners goes back to look for Poo while Shut Up waits at the station.

A policeman approaches Shut Up and asks "What's your name?" He replies "Shut Up." The policeman asks again "What's your name?!" He replies "Shut Up!" Annoyed, the policeman asks "Where are your manners?"

He replies "Gone picking up Poo."

Joke: Teacher: Give me a sentence that starts with the letter, "I".
Student: Okay! I is the...
Teacher: Stop! Don't say 'is' after "I". Always put 'am' after "I".
Student: Okay! I am the ninth letter of the alphabet!

Joke: A man is giving his son advice, "Whenever you buy something on the street, offer them half of what they want."

So the boy is our one day and wants to buy a Coke. He approaches a street vendor and asks how much. The vendor replies, "$2.56."

The boy says, "I'll give you $1.28." The vendor is outraged at first and tries to negotiate a higher price, but fails. He finally gives in, "Okay, $1."

The boy replies, "64 cents." The vendor is outraged but eventually agrees again.

This continues until the price is at 2 cents. The vendor says, "It's pointless now, just have it for free."

The boy says, "I'll take two."