Funny Jokes

Joke: Why can't you explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

Joke: How do you make a blonde laugh on Sunday morning?

Joke: What do you call a blonde that dyes her hair a different color?

Joke: What do you do if life hands you melons?

Joke: A man goes to a restaurant where he sees a sign on the wall that says: "If we can't fill your order, we'll give you $500."

So when the waitress comes to his table he orders, "I'll have rye toast with elephant dung."

The waitress writes down his order and calmly walks to the kitchen. About ten minutes later the manager storms out of the kitchen and lays out $500 on the man's table. Angry, the manager says, "Are you happy? This is the first time in ten years we haven't had rye bread!"