Funny Jokes

 

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Joke: Two eager athletes approach the football coach telling him they want to play on his football team. Okay says the coach, but first we have to give you a test to see if you're intelligent enough to play on my team (select your least favorite college team). They go to the classroom for the test. The first question on the test is " Old MacDonald had a ______." After a few minutes, one of the guys whispers to the other... "Hey... what did old MacDonald have?" The other guy exclaims, "You dummy! Old MacDonald had a FARM!!" "Ohh Yeah.... Okay." says the first guy. A couple of minutes later, the first guy whispers again... " Hey... how do you spell FARM?" "Oh c'mon you dummy. Don't you remember the song?


Punch line: "Old Mac Donald had a farm! E-I-E-I-O!!!"


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Joke: Three guys walk into a bar. U think the last two would of ducked!


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Joke: What do you call a doll that is on fire?


Punch line: A BarbyCue!


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Joke: There was an English man, and Irish man and a German man on a plane. There is too much cabin pressure, so the captain comes up to the English man and says: YOU, DROP AN ITEM. He chose a stone. There is still too much cabin pressure, so he parachutes out. When he lands, a man is crying. He asks the man what is wrong. The man says : WELL, I WAS OUT HERE POLISHING MY JAG, AND THIS STONE CAME FROM THE SKY AND DENTED THE BONNET.Back up on the plane, the Irish man drops an item. He drops a knife. He too has to parachute out. When he lands, a woman is crying. The woman tells him : I WAS OUT HERE GARDENING, AND THIS KNIFE FELL FROM THE SKY AND CUT MY PRIZE MELON IN HALF. Back up on the plane, the German drops an item. He drops a bomb. He too parachutes to the ground, but to the sound of utter laughter. He says : WHATS SO FUNNY?. man says : I WAS OUT HERE GARDENING, I FARTED AND NEXT DOORS HOUSE BLEW UP!


Punch line: LOL


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Joke: What did the big volcano say to the small volcano


Punch line: YOUR TOO YOUNG TO SMOKE


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