Funny Jokes

Joke: Two boys, John and Tommy, walk into a candy story. While in the store John steals 4 candy bars and puts them in his pocket. When the boys leave John brags, "I stole 3 candy bars, beat that!"

Tommy says "No problem, just follow me." They go back into the store and Tommy approaches one of the shopkeepers.

He asks the shopkeeper, "Would you like to see some magic sir?" The man says yes and Tommy immediately opens 4 candy bars and eats them as fast as he can.

The shopkeeper, who is now angry, asks "Where is the magic?"

Tommy replies "The candy bars are now in my friend's pockets."

Joke: Why is pushing the envelope pointless?

Joke: What do mermaids wear to math class?

Joke: What do vegetables get in bowling?

Joke: A man went to the store to buy 6 cans on Sprite. You can imagine how mad he was when he got home and discovered he had picked 7UP.