Funny Jokes

Joke: How do you know when your hallucinations are getting better?

Joke: A brunette asked a blonde scuba diver why they jumped off of the boat backwards.

The blonde replied, "If I jumped forwards I would still be in the boat."

Joke: How is the Pope like a Christmas tree?

Joke: If there are three men in a boat with a bunch of fireworks but no lighters, what do they do?

Joke: A blonde, brunette, and a red head are stuck on the roof of a house. Fire fighters are holding a blanket for them to jump onto. They tell the brunette to jump to safety. When she jumps they pull the blanket away and she hurts her butt.

Next the fire fighters tell the red head she needs to jump or she'll never get down. She refuses because she is scared they will pull the blanket away. They tell her "It was an accident." So she jumps and they pull the blanket away. She hurts her butt and yells at them.

Finally the blonde gets smart and tells them "I know what you're going to do. Just lay the blanket on the ground and back away."