Joke: A guy moves into a new house just outside of the city. While he is unpacking his car a truck pulls up and the window rolls down "Hey there neighbor! I just saw you were moving in and I wanted to invite you to a welcome party."

The guy puts his box down and replies "That sounds great."

The guy gets out of his truck and says "Yeah, there will be drinking, fighting, dancing and sex."

The new guy replies "Oh, okay. What should I wear?"

"You look fine," the neighbor replies, "It's just gonna be me and you anyways."

Joke: Little Timmy asked his dad "Where do people come from?"

His dad replied "Adam and Eve were the first people and they had children. Then their children had children and so on."

Later Timmy asked his mom the same question and she said "We evolved from monkeys."

Timmy went to his father and asked him why he lied and told him what his mother had said. His dad replied "Your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Joke: Where did the horse live?

Joke: Knock knock!
Who's there?
Amos.
Amos who?
A mosquito. Open the door so I can bite you!

Joke: What is Labor Day?

Joke: Why did the mathematician spill all of his food in the oven?